The Sleepover Manual

In For Men, Sex by Isis Nezbeth0 Comments


Dear Men,

Last week I was on vacation, so we’re a week overdue… but BOY do I have a topic for you! If I’m not mistaken, by this point you’ve let a female sleep over for a day or more. Unfortunately, us gals aren’t as talented at letting you fellas know just what that time means to us. The frequency of sleepovers communicates a lot to us gals, but I’m pretty sure you probably didn’t know that. So, as usual, I’m here to shed light on the situation. Let’s get into it!


Whether you realize it and don’t care or you don’t realize it at all, a one-nighter usually doesn’t feel good to a female. Usually the only motivation behind a one-nighter is sex. Really and truly, the only times a female is okay with this type of sleepover is if she’s drunk and doesn’t plan on seeing you again or if she’s feeling confident that there will be another invitation in the (very) near future. Don’t fail to realize that often times when a female is drunk and desires to sleep with someone she doesn’t know, it’s usually to fill a void of some kind. So, don’t put yourself in that predicament. Yes, I’m saying that those girls generally turn out to be the crazy ones!

Every Other Day-Ers

Don’t confuse this with sleeping over consecutively; although intentions may be the same… when she’s staying over multiple times a week, she’ll still be sensitive to the time you two are spending together–but she’ll be a lot less likely to leave her stuff behind and engage in the ‘playing house’ actions so soon. This is a much more comfortable situation for the both of you when you’re both feeling each other, but things haven’t gotten too serious. At this point, when she’s sleeping over its not just about sex. She really wants to spend quality time with you and more than likely enjoys falling asleep in your arms and waking up to your morning breath. If you’ve reached this stage and it’s still just about the sex for you… it’s probably best to let the poor girl go.

Frequent, Consecutive Nights

When you allow a female to stay over consecutive nights, DO NOT believe her when she says it means nothing–shit has definitely gotten real. To her, it may not be a huge deal, but it definitely means something. Whether making a relationship between the two of you seem closer in reach (if she doesn’t already see it as a reality) or if she’s proving to herself that she takes precedence over the ‘next’ female… it means something to her. This is when you’ll start seeing a lot of the playing house actions. She’ll be cooking without being asked or leaving clothes at your place instead of bringing a ‘spend-the-night bag’ every time she comes around and she’ll probably be wearing your clothes as night clothes just to name a few. Honestly, I wouldn’t be surprised if you start hearing her reference this as ours or calling your place ‘home’. Trust me, if she’s not saying it to you.. she’s definitely sneaking it in when talking to her friends. Ultimately, to her, it’s safe to say that things are getting pretty serious between the two of you. You may even find that she’s wanting to be at the house even when you’re not there. Again, at this point, sex has nothing to do with her presence there. She’s there for you. You may not have realized it, but once the two of you reach this stage… the end goal is more than likely to be in a relationship with you.

Another motive a female may have behind staying over so much is to make sure that no one else is staying over! Don’t be blind to that fact either. Not all girls are looking for a relationship… some girls just want to milk you for as much as they can so don’t be naïve to the fact that you fellas can “get got” just like a female can.

Don’t forget… It’s our little secret!




What Do You Think?